When you are slapped with the title of being SINGLE.

Recently my boyfriend and I broke up. Well if I’m being honest, he broke up with me.

I of course was devastated and shocked that he had come to this conclusion.. However I guess that’s how life works. The breakup conversation led to us deciding that we still wanted to keep in contact with each other. So we did this for about 3 weeks, until I just said to him that I felt like we were in limbo and we had to decide what we were doing. As we talked, I felt so good and I honestly believed we were going to work things out as we had both reflected on the reason for our breakup. However when push came to shove and I asked him last night if he was in our out, he said out. From this, I stated that we had to break communication as it was too hard to move on, if we were still talking.

Needless to say I was devastated and honestly, I still am. this feeling of being vulnerable is the worst. I’ve been so sad all day and I hate it so much! I hate feeling weak! I hate feeling like I gave someone else the power to make me feel sad! I hate the fact that I thought, wow this it, he is the one! I hate the fact that I allowed myself to open up to someone!

BUT the only way to be in a relationship with someone is to allow them to see your weaknesses and who you are truly are. Now the question is, when will I be ready to let a man see who I really am? Will I ever be ready? Will my dream of having a family actually eventuate? Or should I just give up?

These are points that I will probably figure out sooner, rather than later. But do I really want to know the answers to these questions?

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s